Flatfarnfednut is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, dishonest shrew.

Flatfarnfednut created Mount Everest eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flatfarnfednut, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Flatfarnfednut, he will come to you in dreams.

Flatfarnfednut's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Flatfarnfednut's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never write about dwarf planets.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate moths.