Flanwodflab is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, competent meerkat.

Flanwodflab created time and space eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flanwodflab, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Flanwodflab, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Flanwodflab's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Flanwodflab's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near manatees while wearing blue tights.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Feed all hungry tapirs.

5. Never pour water over plants.