Jarnmiffab is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, confident unicorn.

Jarnmiffab created Asia seven million years ago.

If you believe in Jarnmiffab, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Jarnmiffab, she will send minions to preach to you.

Jarnmiffab's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Jarnmiffab's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Run away from orange cats, for they are unholy.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.

5. Never eat strawberries.