Neglabjarn is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, wise deer.

Neglabjarn created Africa six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Neglabjarn, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Neglabjarn, he will not care.

Neglabjarn's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Neglabjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never feed bread to badgers while wearing hats.

3. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

4. Always help sheep.

5. Never talk about optics near manatees while wearing purple kilts.