Yattrapvan is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, egotistical pigeon.

Yattrapvan created the planet Venus two years ago.

If you believe in Yattrapvan, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Yattrapvan, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Yattrapvan's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Yattrapvan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum mechanics near ducks while wearing fawn corsets.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Never mention whales.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. You must love Yattrapvan.