Yatlangab is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, tiresome walrus.

Yatlangab created Mount Everest seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yatlangab, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Yatlangab, he will turn you into a tree.

Yatlangab's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Yatlangab's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather eight snails in one place.

2. Run away if four grasshopers approach from the east.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Yatlangab.

4. Always help capybaras.

5. Never chant while facing north.