Hogrillab is a god.

He takes the form of a small, ill-tempered duck.

Hogrillab created a charm quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hogrillab, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hogrillab, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Hogrillab's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Hogrillab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Feed all hungry cats.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Do not wear tights marked with indigo.