Bitzodraw is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, intelligent troll.

Bitzodraw created water eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bitzodraw, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Bitzodraw, he will turn you into a puffin.

Bitzodraw's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Bitzodraw's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never write about ultrasonics.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Run away if three eagles approach from the south.