Matjadcet is a god.

He takes the form of a large, prudent swallow.

Matjadcet created oxygen three million years ago.

If you believe in Matjadcet, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Matjadcet, he will turn you into a plant.

Matjadcet's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Matjadcet's Holy Commandments

1. Monkeys are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never sit in winter.

3. Retreat if eight doves approach from the south.

4. Do not take Matjadcet's name in vain.

5. Do not speak sacred words in summer.