Loopzakdam is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, unfair mouse.

Loopzakdam created the planet Saturn two years ago.

If you believe in Loopzakdam, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Loopzakdam, she will not care at all.

Loopzakdam's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Loopzakdam's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Loopzakdam on top of all buildings.

2. Do not gather at towers at dusk.

3. Do not fashion tools from titanium.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Always make sure there are no seals in a building before entering it.