Sagbaport Poppomnibflam is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, annoying goat.

Sagbaport Poppomnibflam created Europe two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sagbaport Poppomnibflam, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Sagbaport Poppomnibflam, it will throw large rocks at you.

Sagbaport Poppomnibflam's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Sagbaport Poppomnibflam's Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare cucumbers during spring.

2. Never talk about chlorophyll.

3. You must never eat parsnips.

4. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.