Vogbogbass is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, fussy tapir.

Vogbogbass created a photon eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vogbogbass, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Vogbogbass, he will make you grow a tail.

Vogbogbass' most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Vogbogbass' Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not dye your hair magenta.

3. Do not count beyond nine during ceremonies.

4. Never mark doors with orange.

5. Do not chant in public.