Flaplanyarp Likyam is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, contented hamster.

Flaplanyarp Likyam created Mount Everest five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flaplanyarp Likyam, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Flaplanyarp Likyam, she will torture you forever.

Flaplanyarp Likyam's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Flaplanyarp Likyam's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never fashion tools from ash.

3. Never eat turnips on holy days.

4. Always act with obedience when addressing children.

5. Always help turtles.