Genbapyik is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, witless wyrm.

Genbapyik created tapeworms nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Genbapyik, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Genbapyik, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Genbapyik's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Genbapyik's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather nine birds in one place.

2. You must never eat carrots.

3. Genbapyik must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never chant in holy places.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.