Safbassbod is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, benevolent aardvark.

Safbassbod created the Sombrero Galaxy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Safbassbod, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Safbassbod, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Safbassbod's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Safbassbod's Holy Commandments

1. Never travel toward the north during summer.

2. Never remain kneeling at midday.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Safbassbod.

4. Never discuss bacteria in public assemblies.

5. Never think about archaea.