Campinjad is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, irritating goat.

Campinjad created the Sun six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Campinjad, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Campinjad, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Campinjad's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Campinjad's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat lentils on days of mourning.

2. Do not travel during spring.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Never talk about comets.

5. Always treat sharks with great respect.