Kanmidfar Wodcidjipkabkabzenlanbig is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, overgenerous otter.

Kanmidfar Wodcidjipkabkabzenlanbig created light eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kanmidfar Wodcidjipkabkabzenlanbig, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Kanmidfar Wodcidjipkabkabzenlanbig, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Kanmidfar Wodcidjipkabkabzenlanbig's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Kanmidfar Wodcidjipkabkabzenlanbig's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about eukaryotes.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate ducks.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never fashion tools from wood.

5. Never think about dwarf planets.