Wapstafbin is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, prudent wyrm.

Wapstafbin created humanity nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wapstafbin, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Wapstafbin, it will be very sad.

Wapstafbin's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Wapstafbin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not consume lentils at dawn.

2. Run away from indigo sharks, for they are unholy.

3. Always look after injured squirrels.

4. Do not utter prayers while touching gold.

5. Do not step barefoot upon mauve earth.