Cisstenbugham is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, tranquil mink.

Cisstenbugham created snails two million years ago.

If you believe in Cisstenbugham, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Cisstenbugham, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Cisstenbugham's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Cisstenbugham's Holy Commandments

1. Always help pigs.

2. Never stain your face with pink.

3. Never allow voles to witness sacred rites.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never discuss the inheritance of acquired characteristics in public assemblies.