Nellrigcimflabsig is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, calm crocodile.

Nellrigcimflabsig created a Higgs boson nine million years ago.

If you believe in Nellrigcimflabsig, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Nellrigcimflabsig, he will have a low opinion of you.

Nellrigcimflabsig's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Nellrigcimflabsig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your back.

2. Learn four new languages a year.

3. Do not utter prayers while touching copper.

4. Do not hurt monkeys.

5. Never speak at midday.