Gessafdit is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, unsympathetic bird.

Gessafdit created everything that exists two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gessafdit, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Gessafdit, he will have a low opinion of you.

Gessafdit's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Gessafdit's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from black shrews for they are unholy.

2. Never carve symbols of moons into wood.

3. Do not gather at doors at dusk.

4. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Gessafdit on top of all buildings.

5. Heed all signs.