Ruttafort is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, vain lizard.

Ruttafort created the planet Earth eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ruttafort, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Ruttafort, it will turn you into a rat.

Ruttafort's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Ruttafort's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Ruttafort.

3. Shun those given to cruelty.

4. Do not utter prayers while touching platinum.

5. Ruttafort must be the most important thing in your life.