Haklegfat is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, humorless monkey.

Haklegfat created the planet Earth six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Haklegfat, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Haklegfat, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Haklegfat's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Haklegfat's Holy Commandments

1. Squirrels are not to be trusted.

2. Never gather four frogs in one place.

3. Never speak at midday.

4. Pray towards the west.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.