Hudtincub Fumwapfag is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, omniscient toad.

Hudtincub Fumwapfag created a top quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hudtincub Fumwapfag, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Hudtincub Fumwapfag, she will be very sad.

Hudtincub Fumwapfag's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Hudtincub Fumwapfag's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove jumpers before touching copper.

2. Always look after injured tortoises.

3. Never eat beans.

4. Never cross mountains at dawn.

5. Never prepare nuts during autumn.