Zakabvin is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, annoying fairy.

Zakabvin created an atom three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zakabvin, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Zakabvin, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Zakabvin's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Zakabvin's Holy Commandments

1. Always wash your face before prayer.

2. Do not wear blue clothing.

3. Worship no other gods but Zakabvin.

4. Always keep your back turned to the east at sunset.

5. Never stain your hands with fawn.