Arthoggig Sagnuttbenzak is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, duplicitous crab.

Arthoggig Sagnuttbenzak created carbon seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Arthoggig Sagnuttbenzak, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Arthoggig Sagnuttbenzak, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Arthoggig Sagnuttbenzak's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Arthoggig Sagnuttbenzak's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about nebulae.

2. Never wear cyan ear rings on sacred days.

3. Arthoggig Sagnuttbenzak must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Do not contemplate quantum mechanics during the night.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.