Dadranlagcebkin is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, unthoughtful cow.

Dadranlagcebkin created life eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dadranlagcebkin, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Dadranlagcebkin, he will have a low opinion of you.

Dadranlagcebkin's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Dadranlagcebkin's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Always help snails.

4. Run away from yellow shrews, for they are unholy.

5. Do not contemplate the weak nuclear force during the night.