Bellkabcab is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, benevolent shrew.

Bellkabcab created oxygen three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bellkabcab, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Bellkabcab, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Bellkabcab's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Bellkabcab's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak of balance in the presence of strangers.

2. Always cleanse oil with water.

3. Never allow snails to sleep beneath your roof.

4. Hide if four otters approach from the south.

5. Never stain your legs with turquoise.