Baflunlik Somcetpit Hakcapcim is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, kind swan.

Baflunlik Somcetpit Hakcapcim created the Sol system two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Baflunlik Somcetpit Hakcapcim, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Baflunlik Somcetpit Hakcapcim, she will refuse to believe in you.

Baflunlik Somcetpit Hakcapcim's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Baflunlik Somcetpit Hakcapcim's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear mauve hats on sacred days.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Always treat dolphins with great respect.

4. Never speak of chaos in the presence of children.

5. Never stain your neck with red.