Fatfunzim is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, annoying rhinoceros.

Fatfunzim created the Sol system eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fatfunzim, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Fatfunzim, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Fatfunzim's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Fatfunzim's Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare aubergines during spring.

2. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never feed grapes to hamsters while wearing kilts.

4. Fast once a month.

5. You must pray to Fatfunzim six times a day.