Wothaspas is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, kind finch.

Wothaspas created tapeworms two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wothaspas, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Wothaspas, he will torture you forever.

Wothaspas' most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Wothaspas' Holy Commandments

1. Never tolerate whispers in holy places.

2. Feed all hungry ducks.

3. You must love Wothaspas.

4. Retreat if five moths approach from the west.

5. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.