Stikhinquimlarpdotnill is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, resourceful rhinoceros.

Stikhinquimlarpdotnill created an electron five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stikhinquimlarpdotnill, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Stikhinquimlarpdotnill, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Stikhinquimlarpdotnill's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Stikhinquimlarpdotnill's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat grapes on holy days.

2. Never point your neck toward the west during prayer.

3. Do not hurt birds.

4. Never mention ducks.

5. Stikhinquimlarpdotnill loves snails, so they must be honoured.