Lipafjambet is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, boastful alligator.

Lipafjambet created a down quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lipafjambet, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Lipafjambet, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Lipafjambet's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Lipafjambet's Holy Commandments

1. Heed all portents.

2. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in purple.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never think about ultrasonics near swans while wearing yellow jumpers and balancing six copper spheres on your back.