Targtikstaf is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, omniscient hedgehog.

Targtikstaf created the Sombrero Galaxy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Targtikstaf, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Targtikstaf, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Targtikstaf's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Targtikstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Targtikstaf.

4. Do not wear skirts marked with pink.

5. Never mention snakes.