Fitsasflag is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, emotional finch.

Fitsasflag created humanity five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fitsasflag, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Fitsasflag, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Fitsasflag's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Fitsasflag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Worship no other gods but Fitsasflag.

3. Always remove hats before touching lead.

4. Never point your arms toward the east during prayer.

5. Do not take Fitsasflag's name in vain.