Sanvidhig is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, dishonourable badger.

Sanvidhig created light three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sanvidhig, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Sanvidhig, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Sanvidhig's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Sanvidhig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum gravity near swans while wearing brown shoes and balancing eight tin spheres on your face.

2. Do not gather at wells at midnight.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never gather seven doves in one place.

5. Always pray immersed in water.