Mabgeblak is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, astonishing cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Mabgeblak created the Sol system two billion years ago.

If you believe in Mabgeblak, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Mabgeblak, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Mabgeblak's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Mabgeblak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak sacred words in spring.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never write about dark energy.

4. Always cleanse your hands after touching aluminium.

5. Remain standing during prayer.