Cinlitgup is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, able snail.

Cinlitgup created carbon two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cinlitgup, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Cinlitgup, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Cinlitgup's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Cinlitgup's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak aloud of secrets.

2. Never wear skirts.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not speak about pineapples.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cinlitgup.