Dobsafquillbid is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, selfish porpoise.

Dobsafquillbid created a strange quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Dobsafquillbid, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Dobsafquillbid, he will send you a sign.

Dobsafquillbid's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Dobsafquillbid's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear white.

2. Do not keep nine grasshopers in a large pit.

3. Do not fashion sacred items from bone.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Dobsafquillbid.

5. Never record names.