Zigzogcarhig Hudgofgov is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, all-powerful seal.

Zigzogcarhig Hudgofgov created humankind eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zigzogcarhig Hudgofgov, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Zigzogcarhig Hudgofgov, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Zigzogcarhig Hudgofgov's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Zigzogcarhig Hudgofgov's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Zigzogcarhig Hudgofgov's name in vain.

2. Do not shave your head.

3. Never run in autumn.

4. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

5. Always help sick capybaras.