Dubsaslap is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, intelligent frog.

Dubsaslap created the cosmos seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dubsaslap, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Dubsaslap, she will ignore you.

Dubsaslap's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Dubsaslap's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about photosynthesis.

2. Retreat if eight whales approach from the south.

3. You must never eat carrots.

4. Never paint your hands black.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.