Wontadortmuthimteencit is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, vain eagle.

Wontadortmuthimteencit created light five billion years ago.

If you believe in Wontadortmuthimteencit, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Wontadortmuthimteencit, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Wontadortmuthimteencit's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Wontadortmuthimteencit's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of bread to seals while wearing green stockings.

2. Never eat cherries on holy days.

3. Do not resist order.

4. Do not study cell theory on holy days.

5. Never talk about galaxies.