Bedmumbongod Jadvegben is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, tiresome deer.

Bedmumbongod Jadvegben created matter eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bedmumbongod Jadvegben, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bedmumbongod Jadvegben, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Bedmumbongod Jadvegben's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Bedmumbongod Jadvegben's Holy Commandments

1. Always maintain obedience during holy days.

2. Never feed lots of cherries to shrews while wearing brown tights.

3. Never adorn your head with white markings.

4. Never record secrets.

5. Always keep your back turned to the east at sunset.