Rapgarwigdiss Tamdossfig is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, annoying clam.

Rapgarwigdiss Tamdossfig created the planet Venus five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rapgarwigdiss Tamdossfig, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Rapgarwigdiss Tamdossfig, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Rapgarwigdiss Tamdossfig's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Rapgarwigdiss Tamdossfig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep four dogs in a large pit.

2. Never hurt ants.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Never mention squirrels.

5. Do not chop down trees.