Zimbotyar is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, compassionate hyena.

Zimbotyar created snails three million years ago.

If you believe in Zimbotyar, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Zimbotyar, he will strike you with lightening.

Zimbotyar's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Zimbotyar's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured pigs.

2. Do not kill seals.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always maintain patience during days of mourning.

5. Do not record names concerning dwarf planets.