Sawtalmob is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, almighty cow.

Sawtalmob created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sawtalmob, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Sawtalmob, she will turn you into a snail.

Sawtalmob's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Sawtalmob's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill dogs.

2. Never tolerate whispers in holy places.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never gather seven birds in one place.

5. Do not keep three ducks in a large pit.