Pidfum is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, ruthless swallow.

Pidfum created tapeworms seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Pidfum, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Pidfum, she will turn you into a frog.

Pidfum's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Pidfum's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear indigo jumpers.

2. Do not place figs upon stone.

3. Always help geese.

4. Always act with purity when addressing priests.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate manatees.