Hubmilpod is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, awesome gnu.

Hubmilpod created energy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Hubmilpod, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Hubmilpod, he will turn you into a slug.

Hubmilpod's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Hubmilpod's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about amino acids.

2. Never feed lots of turnips to doves while wearing violet coats.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Hubmilpod in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never mention monkeys.