Volflan is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, conceited centipede.

Volflan created the planet Venus four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Volflan, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Volflan, he will send you a sign.

Volflan's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Volflan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

3. Never go into orange rooms.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Put Volflan first in all things.