Litrutcad is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, vain penguin.

Litrutcad created the Sol system nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Litrutcad, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Litrutcad, she will jump up and down on your head.

Litrutcad's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Litrutcad's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not shave your hands.

3. Never feed turnips to sharks while wearing gray kilts.

4. You must love Litrutcad.

5. Always help horses in need.